10 Reasons I’m Done Having Babies

Though as I’ve mentioned, baby boys are awesome, I’ll be honest that I wanted each of my pregnancies to be girls. My husband really doesn’t particularly want daughters (mostly out of fear) but more than anything, he never wanted more than two children. Which is why when we found out that number two was another boy, he was concerned. He knew that it would start me thinking of having a third to try for a girl. 

For a while I did entertain the idea of trying for a girl. I had been thinking that I would want a longer gap this time, maybe wait until number two was four or five years old, but now I’m quite convinced that we will not be having any more babies. Here is why…

1) A baby will grow into a toddler.
I could list 1 a through z for why this is a problem, but I’ll leave that for another time. Having a three year old has me in awe of people who have more than a two children. I got pregnant the second time before my first started to make every effort to make us crazy. He started that while I was pregnant, and though I informed him that it was too late to try to convince me that we shouldn’t have another baby, he has endured to be the most convincing birth control ever.

2) I’d have to potty train another human.
We have to replace all of the carpeting in the house due to potty training, and I really don’t want to have to do that so many times.

3) I’d end up with three boys.

4) Traveling with small children is ridiculous.
To the people who get on a plane and get really agitated by the fact that there are little ones on board, please let me tell you who is really going to have the worst time; the parents! Trying to keep babies and toddlers still, quiet, entertained, and fed, while keeping them from kicking the seat in front of them and trying to avoid spilling food all over the plane and losing their toys, is a nightmare. Not to mention how much more expensive traveling gets when you add more people. Furthermore, five people are harder to accommodate in most hotel rooms and it takes longer to get a table at a restaurant. 

5) Potty training.
I’m already dreading having to potty train the baby that just turned one. I’m thinking I’ll delay it as long as possible until he’s really super ready. Maybe when he’s seven or something. It’s really just the worst.

6) We can’t afford all of the wine and booze I’d need.
Juggling two children is already wearing on my mental health. A third and I’ll be a bonafide nutcase. Or a lush. At least alcohol is cheaper than therapy.

7) I’d really love to wear my “not pregnant or nursing” clothing again.
I just celebrated my fourth wedding anniversary and I have been pregnant or nursing ever since we got home from the honeymoon. There are so many things in my closet that haven’t really had a chance to see the light of day in four years, and I miss them. If I’m over dressed for anything, I’m just excited to be able to wear the stuff again.

8) Potty training.
I’m really traumatized by it.

9) My husband has started getting rid of baby stuff.
He already donated the infant travel system and some other things to show how determined he was that we are done. I told him that it was bad luck and that it would ensure that we have an oops baby, but he was cleaning out the garage and couldn’t be stopped.

10) My husband is the absolute worst at being informed he’s having a baby.
Pregnancy reveal #1: I had taken the pregnancy test the day he was coming home from a business trip, so I picked him up at the airport with a sign that read, “Daddy to be.” He had been flying first class so he was a little intoxicated and just acted extremely confused as to how it could be possible.
Pregnancy reveal #2: I didn’t bother with the romance this time, but the first thing he said was, “So after this, what are we going to do to make sure this never happens again?” Really? It won’t be an issue for over a year, and your first thought is future birth control?! How nice. Please note, he did want us to have a second child.

Party of four 4ever. 

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